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Roses are red Violets are blue one plus one Equals two

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What did the man say to his wife before she made him a sandwhich? Do your job and make me a sandwhich.

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Why? Because.

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Why was the black person playing hockey? Because he found an interest to the sport during his childhood years.

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What does bigfoot have? Big feet.

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Knock, knock who's there? Steve Evans. Steve Evans who? You've already forgotten me? We just met on Eharmony yesterday.

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Please don't tell anybody about me, or I will be hunted down, taken from my family, and be objected to a life of cruel exploitation.

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What is worse then having no dad? Russian dad that hates you a lot and wishes you drawn in vodka.

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What did Hellen Keller say when she drove up to the stop sign? Nothing, she doesn't drive.

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What is the easiest method of making multiple women fall head over heels? Have a wingman help you raise a rope at the start of a women's running race.

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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30cm = 0,3meters

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Q: What do you call half of the worlds population of black people on the moon. A: Close enough.

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Curiosity killed the cat, Oh wait, I thought the dog did.

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100 chefs walk into a bar

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You know what's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile where one's alive in the middle, and has to eat his way out.

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Once upon a time, there was a Y O U M A D and they all lived happily ever after.

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What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing set? She has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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What did my uncle get for Christmas? Me... MagicMonkey

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What's black and white and red all over? A butler with a stab wound.

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whats brown and half eaten? yeah an easter egg that a parent has given to there son/daughter before dinner

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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