What's worse than a dead baby in a barrel? A dead baby in 8 barrels.

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Did you hear about the blond that jumped off a bridge? She died.

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Why had the father left his family. Because he was tired of dancing in a circle.

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What do u call a joke with no punchline? An anti-joke

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A Jew walked into Germany. He never walked back out.

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Its not a big mistake at all, if people do not want to get hypnotized you cant hypnotize them, or so I thought...

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What did the gym coach tell his student? Come on! You can do it! Push harder!

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A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his village.

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You are joking right?

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Whats the difference between a monkey and a baby? Eating a baby tastes better with saltines.

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What's red and blue and goes 105 MPH? A red and blue car.

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Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

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Why are there so many blacks in prison? *The rest of this joke has been removed to avoid causing offence*

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What does and elephant and me have in common. Everything, I am an elephant.

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Ten years ago we had Steve Jobs, Bob Hope and Johnny Cash ... now we have no Jobs, no Hope and no Cash.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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roses are red violets are blue bullets are lead now i shoot you

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What do you call a child with a peg leg, and eye patch, and no hand? Names

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What's worse than finding a worm in your pork? Finding half of a worm, because the worm you just ate is going to live in your stomach, breed, then come out your butt. Or the Apocalypse.

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Q:What were Helen Keller's dying words? A: Speaking is difficult when you have no way of hearing others. Apart from that, just hours before you die, you become unaware of your surroundings, and have a harder time communicating. Both these problems merged together made it basically impossible for her to speak before death.

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a older brother and a lil brother have bunk beds, one night the older brother has his gf sneak over, they are going to have sex. he tells his gf, "say lettace for a new positon and say tomato for stop", they start and she screams, "lettace, tomato, lettace, tomato". then the lil brother says " will you guys stop making salad, ur getting mayonase all over my face!!!!"

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In your case, maybe because it is time to stop thinking so much, and begin living life, if the world cannot appreciate a wise man such as yourself, maybe that man should stop being wise, and begin being happy.

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Why do teens say "dude?" They feel unloved at home and must know that they posses a strong relationship with their peers, and in fact, cannot maintain a proper friendship due to the four letter word known as "dude."

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Giant scorpions, red roses, adoption, the holocaust, bars, changing light bulbs, and fridges.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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