A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Q: Who's driving? A: The cops

How do you fit three gay men on a stool? You don't, that would be very uncomfortable.

How did the little boy break his arm? He was trampleed by elephants.

What's the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair

Jesus can walk on water. Babies are 75% water. I can walk on babies. I am... In jail.

What do you call a Muslim driving a plane? You don't drive a plane.

Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

What did Elvis say when he lost his voice? Nothing.

What's brown and says "Hey, I'm a dog"? A talking dog, able to grasp the English language.

Gay jokes are a real pain in the butt.

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

A nun, a jew, and a KKK member are all stuck together in a lifeboat. A large wave overturns the boat and they all drown.

What's the difference between a duck?

A jew goes to a bar,then wakes up with presents under his candels.

Q. Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone? A. He got attacked by a dog.

11111

Diana and victoria

Two cannibals are eating around a fire in the jungle, and one turns to the other and says "Does this taste funny to you?" Oh yeah, and they're eating a clown.

What do you call a black guy with a shotgun? A fine American citizen exercising his 2nd Amendment right.

Whats round, hard, and full of seaman? Well in the context I'm using it in, a submarine, but too the inappropriate mind when spoken out loud, could be registered as the homophone of seaman, semen, which would then lead you too think of male genitalia.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have to go to the bathroom...

What do super heroes say after they beat the villain? Nothing, super heroes are not real.

a. why? b. because I wanted

What's sadder than the Holocaust? Not a lot of things because it was probably one of the most depressing series of events that happened in the 20th Century.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...