What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt? Getting stabbed.

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What do you get if you put a black man in the blender and then in the microwave ? ... I don't know, that's why I'm asking.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Get in the van, or I'll kill you.

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why was the man itchy? because he had herpies

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It was the eve of December and a man was using a blanket why? because it was cold and he wanted to be able to function properly at work so his boss would not get mad at him because he respected his boss and wanted to make him happy

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A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a grocery store. As they walk past the meat section, the Priest stops, smiles, and turns to the Rabbi. "Feeling Hungry?" The Rabbi reaches down and picks up a pack of Koscher hotdogs.

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How did the square become a circle? Due to the period of recession in our nation, it was found necessary to cut corners.

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Q)whats pink and fluffy A)pink fluff

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Why does an Irish cop wear a belt? To hold up his pants.

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My mom touched my wiener : \

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why did the chef go to jail? because he was caught beating an egg

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Miss Jones has 10 apples on her desk. Billy takes half of them away and runs. What does Miss Jones have? 5 apples and a complaint filed for smacking Billy with a ruler.

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What's a vampire's favorite subject in school? Probably math.

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Why didn't the chicken cross tithe road Because it was a motorway

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a 12 year eld Maxican girl is aksed to spell the werd newmonia she gets it rite and wins the spalling beef which makes me sad bcuz English is my forst langage and i still dont get it and im 25

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How long does it take to cook a baby in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy jacking off.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! That is a joke which very few people would find even mildly entertaining.

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so a baby seal walks into a club...

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A man walks into a bar. "Excuse me sir," he asks, "may I have a beer?" "No," says the bartender.

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Have you seen stevie wonders house? Nope... Neither has he

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A bass player walks past a bar. What? It could happen.

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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Hi Adam,

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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