What did the depressed teenage fat kid do to resolve his issues? Commited suicide.

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What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

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What's the difference between a duck and a bicycle? They both have handlebars. Except for the duck.

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A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

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Whats worse than 10 dead babies in the street? 11 babies in the street.

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Q: why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: because it was dead.

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What´s Green and turns Red at your Finger Tips? Frog in a Blender.

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Whats worse than the holocaust A: not much

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Whats worse than a dog biting you? Cancer.

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why did the T-Rex eat the other dinosaur? Because it is a carnivorous animal.

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What's small and doesn't turn girls on? A bottlecap.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he's not gonna come

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A young boy asks his father if there will be cake at the party. The father tells him there won't be and tells him to f*ck off.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. ----- Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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I never made a mistake. I thought i did once but i was mistaken

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There were 50 koreans; half of them liked gangnam style but the other half didn't. Why didn't the other half like gangnam style? They were north koreans.

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What did the woman say to her abusive husband? You're hurting me.

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What is the difference between a bright red Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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A black man, a small child, and a priest were all standing in line. They were all checking in the hospital after being in a 3 car pileup

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Wife: "I suggest you check properly next time you lose your keys so that you find them quicker" Husband: "I suggest that next time I sit down and have a beer while I wait for Doc Martin and his time machine to give my keys back.

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A man walks into a bar

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Why couldn't Sally ride a bike? She was disabled

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s s is for shit h h is for hit i i is for it t t is turtle

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't cross it. He was pushed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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