How do you stop a rhino from charging? An ak-47

How do you get a dog and a baby mixed up? You stir your chili.

neil likes pube toast

Everyone is different, but there are two of me, therefore I am unique. I have 72 different personalities, which all think, act and behave the same, all have my same name, but its still different to have such a thing eh? No I am not asking, I just added that weird little lightbulb symbol after "eh". People buy my book, its full of this nonsense... Its named "Are you left winged, or wrong winged" The book that has nothing to do with politics, and everything to do with politicians non existent sexlife! (seriously I had a book signing today... It was weird, people like stood in line twenty Signatures... AND PEOPLE ARE ALL GOING "HEY ARE YOU THAT GUY FROM HORSEHEAD?" Nero -WHO THE FUCK! IS THAT GUY ON HORSEHEAD?

Why did the boy let go of his red ballon? Because he was hit by a car

Whats bloody and is dead. My son.

Black people being friendly.

why did the girl fall of the swing someone threw a refrigerator at her

A woman is in a terrible car crash. The husband comes in, runs to the doctor and he says "Doctor! My wife...is she going to make it?" The doctor turns and says "your wife will survive, but she's experienced heavy brain trauma. She will never walk again. You'll have to bathe her, feed her, change her diapers, and cater to her every need." The husband starts crying and says "oh my God that's terrible! Are you serious?" The doctor replies "Yes."

What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

How do you fit 10 babies in a bowl? With a blender. How do you get them out of the bowl? You don't, you've already been arrested for multiple cases of infanticide.

What's Brown and Sticky? A Stick

A priest and a rabbi walk into a gay bar. They are closet homosexuals and are searching for partners to engage in consensual sexual intercourse with.

the man walked into the bar and said ur gay

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? a fridge was thrown at her

What's the difference between a lesbian and a Pringle ? One is a snack cracker, the other is a crack snacker.

Click here to end the world.

Why did Suzie fall of the swing? Because Suzie was a cucumber.

whats worse than having ants in your pants? getting sotomized by a lightsaber

Q. Why couldn't Billy see the pirate movie? A. Because his mom didn't let him.

What is Ron afraid of? Spiders!

A- Knock knock. B- Who's there? A- The interrupting doctor. B- The interrupt- A- You have cancer.

Why did the fat guy smell bad? He just farted diarrhea.

Like is like a penis long and easy. But women make it hard

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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