A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

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Q: why did the prisoner drop his soap? A: easy sex

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hey i just met you,but this is crazy, my name is kony and i just took your baby

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I heard a scary rumor that when you plzy a windows istaller cd backwards, it plays a secret message, but what's even scarier, is that when you play it forwards, it installs windows.

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What smells like diarrhea and looks like poop? A rotten banana.

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What did the mother do when she found out the baby was stillborn? Gave it a proper burial, grieved for months and became a shell of her former self.

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an irishman gets on facebook...he has 7 friend request

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Why was the boy sick? Because he accidently ate his own feces.

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A duck walks into a bar and orders 2 beers and a shot. The bartender says "That'll be four fifty." The duck says he doesn't have any money and asks if the bartender can put it on his bill. The bartender says "No." He then picked the duck up by the neck and raped him mercilessly. "That's what he gets" one patron said. "Yeah, he was asking for it"

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What is useless and over-payed? Our government.

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whats the difference between an iron and a priest? An iron is a hand-held device which presses clothes and a priest is a person who is authorized to perform the sacred rituals of a religion.

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What goes up and down, up and down, up and down, forever? An insult to Newtonian physics.

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MR MC CANN WHATS THE ANSWER

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what's gray, rectangular, and provides a good time? your mother's sex tape.

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why did the little girl throw a clock out of the window? because she wanted to see time fly

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What did one penguin say to the other Nothing, penguins don't talk.

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roses are red violets are blue i have no money could i have some

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Why Are Parking Lines White? - So You Can See Them...

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Want to hear a joke You're Adopted

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Why did Kim Kardashian's and Kris Humphries marriage last so long? It didn't

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Knock knock, ... Little Timmy bursts into tears, Because his parents don't love him.

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will you like this joke my sources say no

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What did the man with one arm get for Christmas? A benchpress

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What do you call black people working in a field? Farmers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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