A man walked into a bar. He got drunk. What did u think he'd do, have coke-a-cola? Dumbass.

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What if I told you.....potatoe

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What did the chicken say to her chicks? One day I'll explain why we do this. For now, just follow me.

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There is an American, a Mexican, and a Muslim on a plane They give the American the 1 parachute and the Mexican and the north koreon explode

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Why did the young boy die from Aggressive cancer? ...Because there isn't a cure.

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blonde: your cute Gangster: wanna go back to my crib blonde: you mean you can go back in time?

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A man walks into a bar. He says "ouch".

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Vote this up or I'll tell my mum!

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What did bob get his wife for christmas? Pregnant

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What do u call a gay dinosaur? Dinosaurs don't exist

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If I met your mom before you was born, you would still be born.

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what happened to your carpool? they died.

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Three dogs start a club called the Holly Place Exclusive Dog Club. The Club Motto is, "You can't be in our club. Just us. Read the sign. It says "Exclusive". How is that confusing? Get away from here. Now."

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Wanna hear a joke about a baby with AIDS? It never gets old.

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Justin Bieber

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What happend to the girl who went to school dreased ugly She took the other students advice and whent home and killed her self

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A girl talks to here boyfriend about collage. What is his responce? Nothing. No one talks about college.

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knock knock whos there? steve oh hi steve please come in

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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You know what it means when a priest lays his watch down on a podium? Absolutely nothing

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I wont be arriving soon alright, I mean I am a overachiever for many reasons many of them not exactly "gifts" (such as the pain I cant shut up about but focus on other things such as my goal surely keeps my mind occupied enough). Thanks about the looks comment, used to think I was pretty good looking myself, so if I am more than the looks, then I really like that one (I know I am being a bit brash, but I haven't felt this... Better in a long time, and if hell if I will fake low self confidence, modesty is not my thing when I am not in the mood to be charming) By the way, Alice is quoting me, and having a laugh doing so apparently, lets just say I wont be typing myself ever again, my fingers are not... Useful, and honestly typing with one hand was always a bitch. Enough about me, ill have one of "my shadows" send you money for a first class (seriously you have spent enough on me, and now that my city is making a revenue and still advancing, its my turn to return whatever I can) Tell your parents you won the lottery and share some of the money with them I am sending you a bit extra so to speak. And ffs do not worry about my body, not even sure if I will walk again and speaking, well while it hurts (Alice is laughing again) people here concluded I would live for faaar longer than their first prognosis since I never been a fan of shutting up, and as I told them, my mouth will keep yapping about 200 years after I die, so no problemo. Ill send you a first class to... Nvm you take the money, and come around whenev... You know what? Ill send a plane, yeah, because we can afford that, not yours to keep but you know...

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What's worse than putting stones in a blender? Putting a baby in a blender.

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What's funnier than 24? NOTHING!!!

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whats the difference between me and callum ? one soul.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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