What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple

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What part of a vegetable are you not supposed to eat? His wheelchair.

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How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

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A man walks into a bar and approaches a man "Ask me if I'm a tree." "Fine.Are you a tree?" "No."

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Where do cows go on the weekends? The slaughterhouse.

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

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Why doesn't the man like iced tea? Because he likes it hot.

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What is funnier than a dead baby? almost everything. there is nothing funny about a dead baby.

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What do you call a good anti-joke? something you feel like you should go to hell for laughing at.

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Why couldn't the color blind orphan find his apple? Because he was also blind.

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Whats red and yellow? A chicken in the blender.

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What's rape when you shout surprise? The crime, committed by a man, of forcing another person to have sexual intercourse with him, especially by the threat or use of violence.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Scientists are still unable to fully understand the brain functioning of chickens enough to comprehend their motives for doing such a thing.

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Q:Why are all of the vampires extinct? A:AIDS is a serious disease. You shouldn't joke about it.

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What did the hat say to the scarf? Nothing.

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Friends are like balloons When you stab them they die.

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CNN has posted that the recent death of osama bin laden is comparable to decapitating a snake when really it is more akin to bisection of a worm.

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Why did Timmy fall down the stairs Because he is blind and I pushed him

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

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"The only thing worse than being talked about is getting AIDS." -Oscar Wilde

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Where did Jonathan go when the bombs hit? Everywhere.

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So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

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Why couldn't Sarah see through her telescope? She was blind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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