Why did Larry drop his suitcase? Because he had no arms. A) Knock knock, B) Who's there? A) Not Larry

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Why do females have boobs? So they can breast feed their babies.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is an Italian pastry with tomato sauce, cheese and other toppings and the other is a human being.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What do you call a Mexican that sails a ship? A sailor

thumb_up thumb_down +40

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

A new scientific study has scientists baffled as it clearly shows that teen sex drastically decreases at age 20.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

A old man walks into a hospital He doesn't come back out

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What word starts with "N" and ends with "R" that you never want to call a black person? Nagger

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Some anti-jokes are funny, some are not!

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Have you ever had a traditional Ethiopian Dinner? Neither have they.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Wha did the fireman say when he burnt his finger? Shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Three guys, stranded on a desert island, find a magic lantern containing a genie, who grants them each one wish. The first guy wishes he was off the island and back home. The second guy wishes the same. The third guy wishes the same.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Pete and Repete are sitting on a fence. Pete falls off. Pete suffers from a scraped knee and a bruised tailbone.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Friends are like balloons When you stab them they die.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

How come Pluto and Goofy are both dogs, but Goofy can talk and Pluto can't? Because Goofy can walk on two legs, and is therefore superior to Pluto in Walt Disney's eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What did the Fish say to the other Fish? Nothing, fish cant talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

why couldnt luke open the door? he had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +34

G

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why wouldn't anyone want Helen Kellers dog? It's been buried for a long time...

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A Horse walks into a Bar. The barman says "Why the long face?" The Horse had cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops