THAT AWKWARD MOMENT... nuff said

Why did the chicken cross the road? Listen, it's a free country.

Christ is a conspiracy

How do you get a Mexican's attention? "Excuse me, may I have your attention?"

Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No it's Supe- oh wait it is a plane

You're as useful as Baby P's dummy.

Whats hard and long and used to penetrate women? A hypodermic needle.

What do you call a man named Cornelius? Well, he prefers to go by his middle name, Eric, because he was teased as a child for being named Cornelius.

I need to start studying.

Why is a cookie like a jellyfish? Because it has no bones. (Contributed by my 4-year old boy)

1.Why were the black men asked to leave the bar? Because it was a womens bar. 2.Why did the 40 year old get an erection? Because he was excited.

What is similar between a horse and a zebra? - If you chopped of there heads, they would die.

What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

whats up and also down? your mum

how do you know if a fish is gay? you ask it

Q: You know what's worse than being a mother? A: Almost everything, because being a mother is not a bad thing, in fact, it's a wonderful thing.

Why does a new mother have big jugs? Her baby died of Sudden infant death syndrome.

What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

What's black, white, and red all over? Numerous different objects because many different things can posses a variety of colors, including the ones listed above.

Man: Am i going to be alright? Doctor: No, you're going to die.

What did the little girl with no legs or arms get for Christmas? Cancer. Knock knock? Who's there? Not that little girl.

Three guys walk into a bar: a Priest, a rapist, and a pedophile...and two other guys

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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