how do you make a baby float take you foot of its head

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Amblyopsidae, or blindfish, commonly found in caves where they are well adapted to life in the dark.

Q: How many Chuck Norrises does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: negitave 999999999999999999e

Hey guess what? Nevermind.

"Do you know the joke about the No and Me Neither?" "No..." "Me neither."

How did the leukemia patient die? He was shot in the leg repeatedly until he died of blood loss.

Why didn't the boomerang return? It hit a baby

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

Why did the boy cry? Because he was mercilessly beaten by his mother.

God said "let there be light" Chuck Noris said "say please

LOL -LOL GUY

Why is ur cousin gay? because ya dad

A bear walks into a bar. The building is evacuated swiftly but several people are killed

A young christian boy walks into a church and gets raped

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS. AIDS is worse.

A guy with no legs walks into a bar.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing. I lied about the deer.

Once upon a time there was a very lonely man. He was kind, strong, handsome, smart, and basically everything that was good and that a girl wanted. Well, one day, through all his immense loneliness, he decided that it was time that he got into a relationship. Knowing that he deserved a competent and pure woman, he went to a local church to search for his perfect match. That night, he took home with him the most beautiful and purest of all the women in the church, brought her to his room, and whipped out his junk on her face.

A black man, a Jewish man, and a gay man walk into a bar. They are all good friends who want to enjoy drinks together.

You're on fire.

Rebecca Black's new album.

Do you know what really makes me smile? Facial Muscles.

What happens if Pinocchio says "My nose is about to grow." Nothing, Pinocchio was a fictional character created by Walt Disney.

What is bright yellow and tastes like Gatorade? Antifreeze

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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