Three men are on a plane*. (*Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas? cancer

whats worse than getting a fail on your math test? Getting shot.

Q: What did the one legged homeless person get for christmass? A: Frostbite.

Whats worse then the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple

whats worse than losing your pet rock? having your dog run over buy a car.

I know a lady who is SOOO fat that when she steps into the ocean, she gets her toes wet!

When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

What's green, red, and goes fifty miles an hour? A frog in a blender.

A Mexican, and Arab and an American are on a plane. The the plane is going down. It hits a mountain and crashes. But there was also a lot of other people on the plane. Families, children, loved ones. It was huge a disaster.

What did the African boy get for his Christmas present for the first time? Leprosy

Why did the hamster run around the wheel.? Because he lived in a small cage and had nothing better to do.

What do you call a dead blond in a closet? A homicide victim.

What did the homeless guy do when he found a quarter? He picked it up

womens sports...

Knock knock! Who's there? Atch! Okay.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

You are such a loner nothing even clings to you, not even plastic wrap!!

What makes the antijokes on this site funny? Nothing.

What did the black person say when his white friend said "Nigga!"? "You know, I really don't get racist jokes like this."

knock knock who's there ? dogs dogs who? phone

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

Q:Who has the highest K/D ratio in Call of Duty World at War A: Hitler, 6000000/1

Knock Knock! Come in.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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