My friend came out.....of the bathroom so I could shit

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a random biological stimulus compelled it to.

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? He had cancer.

What do you get if you put a black man in the blender and then in the microwave ? ... I don't know, that's why I'm asking.

So a black guy walks into a bar, respectively pays his tab and walks out.

I came across a woman on the ground and i said what happend and she said... "i tripped"

A man is having dinner with his family at a restaurant. While eating his food, the father tells the waiter,"This food is delicious! My complements to the Chef." When the waiter comes back to the kitchen he says "You are a very handsome man."

What has five balls and hates Mexicans? The lottery.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled to his face.

A guy walks into a bar, orders a beer, pays, and leaves.

How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck CAN chuck wood, that's why his a wood chuck.

Why did the girl fall off the swings? She didn't have arms

Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

How did the little boy survive war? He respawned at his teams side of the map

Yo mama's so fat, she possesses a Body Mass Index that is above the recommended value for healthy individuals and thus will have a greater risk for heart disease and other related health problems.

The Bible

What is even bigger than an elephant? A gi-ant! (Wait you did say an anty joke right!?)

If you live in the 'living' room, what do you do in the others? You die.

2 guys are best friends from birth, one goes crazy and kills the others family and feel hatred towards each other for eternity.

What did the doctor say to his dying patient? Shit happens.

How many stripes does a Zebra have? Doesn't matter millions of people died in the Holocaust

Why did the little girl jump off a cliff? because she was at a cliff jump at a water park

LALALALA MUSIC MACHINE

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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