How many pancakes do you need to reach a 2.5m roof? Purple, because aliens don't fly

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Why did the first koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala.

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cake cake and no cake, your life just ended

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What's worse than biting into a worm in your apple? Being run over by a stampede of elephants

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Chuck Norris can right-click with a mac mouse

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What do you call a man with an arrow to the knee? An ambulance because he's got a serious leg injury right there.

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How do you make a black guy cry? You kill his family.

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What did a man say to the woman with two black eyes? "Are you okay? Here, let me take you to the hospital." The woman is now healing nicely.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust Whats worse than the holocaust? getting raped by a giant scorpion What's worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? getting raped by your seventh grade math teacher, Mr. Smith What's worse than getting raped by your seventh grade math teacher Mr. Smith? Snapping your femur bone in half What's worse than snapping your femur bone in half? Birthing a dead baby

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Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Hello? Prankster: Hello is your regrigerator running? Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Yes... Prankster: Oh good. I was just calling to make sure. Have a good day!

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What did a boy dying from cancer get for Christmas? The news that his cancer progressed and he would soon die. He underwent a surgery that got rid of the cancer and he was cured. He ran out of the hospital in excitement and got hit by a bus. He recovered slowly, but lived. By this time it was June and his birthday, he returned to school later that year. He got called fat and committed suicide.

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a man walks into the bar and say, OUCH!!

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your mama's so fat she wears big clothing

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Why was girl happy on the day she found out she wasn't pregnant? -It was her birthday.

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why did matt die? He had cancer

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whats worse then being married to your dog eating your dog out

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Johns mother asked him were he had been. John simply replied the shop.

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blonde: your cute Gangster: wanna go back to my crib blonde: you mean you can go back in time?

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i look around to find that my air head is missing, i then figure out that i had eaten it.

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What did Batman say to Superman before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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why did jenny fall off the swing? because she had no arms Knock Knock Whos there? not jenny

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Why did a little kid have a long face Because his face was stretched out by a truck wheel

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What you do if you poo out a slug? Eat it.

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While running away a burgular cut his hand on a piece of glass. He fell to the ground bleeding like crazy. What did the police say when he saw the burgular? You've been caught red handed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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