Yo mamma's so fat, she's self-concsious about her weight and is embarassed when people make fun of her weight which makes her escape to her only friend, food, which makes her even fatter, so she will never lose weight until society accepts her and is not so prejudice towards overweight people.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What starts with F and ends in UCK? Firetruck. What starts with P and ends in ORN? Popcorn. What starts with S and ends in HIT? Shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he wants to drink. He orders a beer.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Bugs dance, so do ants, Oh my glob it’s Adventure Time!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Oh s***

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? several.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you tell your chicken when it is it's birthday. Nothing, because he wouldn't understand you.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was David sad? Because he got his head stuck in a window.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the 15 year old commit suicide? Because his parents and 3 sisters died in a car accident and he went to live with his uncle, who constantly raped him.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

WTF? If you look at life from the right, you might just see whats left, and just then I looked down at the midget as he said "Yo whats up?" I told him, hey do you like left? He said! DAAAAAMN RIIIIIGHT! I spent a while just standing there wondering what the hell was happening into my life, it was so right it was left and wrong... NeroMetal (No fucking idea what Neronism is, I just play streetfighter V and type books that confuse people)

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call it when you mix a raccoon with an 18-wheeler? A bloody mess on the highway. That smells like cheese

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Hey I just met you and this is crazy this song doesn't rhyme penis

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I scream, you scream, we all scream when hit by an ice cream truck

thumb_up thumb_down -3

how does cody get laid? he doesnt.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call a horny horse? A unicorn.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

what did the dog eat for dinner? food.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A gay guy asks a boy out and a girl The girl said no but the guy said yes And the two gay guys went to dinner And made out

thumb_up thumb_down -3

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta pudding god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer left the gait open.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

It's raining it's poring the old man died die to a sudden increase in blood pressure thus leading to a heart attack

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do call a someone with no arms, legs, and has an eye patch? Names

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was the Asian woman late for work? She was raped.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the man put his money in the freezer? hes retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops