Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

Why did Sally fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock. Who's there? Not sally

How many blondes does it take to change a diaper? About a thousand

A mass murderer ran into a bar full of people. He first shot a man. What did the man say when the murderer shot him? Nothing, he was hit in the head and instantly died before he could say anything.

jordan godfrey is good looking lolololol

Q: if it takes a week to walk a fortnight how many pounds of oranges can you fit in a grapegruit. A: None, because there is no bones in ice cream

what is the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

Whats red and black and has 8 legs? 4 dead african babies.

What do blind people see when they close one eye? Nothing.

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

Q: What's blue and smells like grass? A: Blue grass.

where did little suzie go during 9/11 EVERYWHERE...

Why did Little Jimmy cross the road? Little Jimmy doesnt have arms and legs, silly, he cant cross the road.

why did the tortoise cross the road? it does not matter, it got hit by a vehicle and died on impact.

why was six afraid of seven It wasnt. numbers are not sentient or tangible and thus are incapable of feeling fear

Why didn't Suzie ride her bike? Suzie's mother aborded her. She was never born.

What's big, green, has 4 legs, and if it falls out of a tree will kill you? A pool table

cats are pussies

A priest, a rabbi and Santa walk into a bar. that's a highly coincidental situation.

A boy owned a dog that was uncommonly shaggy. Many people remarked upon its considerable shagginess. When the boy learned that there are contests for shaggy dogs, he entered his dog. The dog won first prize for shagginess in both the local and the regional competitions. The boy entered the dog in ever-larger contests, until finally he entered it in the world championship for shaggy dogs. But the day before the championship the dog died.

ajkswhfuilafhgkfdgbluft

hey justin

I wife my butt after I poop. I poop out of my penis.

Who let the dogs out? The burglar, he broke the door and they ran out.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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