What did one saggy boob say to the other one? Better perk up or they'll think we're nuts.

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Why doesn't Susie have a bike? She has no arms. Who pushed Johnny off a cliff? Definitely not Susie.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because a fridge hit him.

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how do you scare a blonde person? dress up in orange and scream "mustard"

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What did Oprah get for christmas? Weight Watchers

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What did the Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I don't know. I can't speak Chinese.

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What did the woman say to the jew? Do you want an almond?

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What is big, grey, has 8 wheels, can fly, swim and walk. I dunno. Thats why I'm asking

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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What's the difference between humans and dogs? 4.

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What did one deer say to the other? Nothing. The second deer was killed while they were eating and now the first deer is scarred dot life.

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I told my friend one of these anti-jokes, he took it seriously and beat my head with a bat.

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a dyslecstic son seys to his mum can i have a mcdonald for tea the mum seys ye if you can spell mcdonlds and the son seys fuk that im having a kcf

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Why did the retirement home go out of business. There was a fire and all of the residents charred to death accept for a couple who escaped but were too traumatized to return to the old folks home.

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A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

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Q: What's the difference between between basketballs and babies? A: I don't shoot basketballs.

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Knock knock.

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knock knock whos there banana banana who knock knock whos there orange orange who orange you glad I didn't say banana

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A duck walks into a bar and says, "Put it on my bill"

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Q. What do you call a person with no arms, legs, torso, or head? A. A mutilated corpse.

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What did the ghost say to the black man? nothing. He just shot him.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing ? Because she lost her balance and the force of gravity put upon her was too great for her to bear, resulting in her fall.

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Why is Joe is ugly? I dont Know

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roses are red you are dumb no one will care when you die

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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