Q: why did the black guy die? A: he got shot

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A cowboy rides into town and stays the weekend but then leaves on Wednesday, how is this possible? He was alive for the weekend and died on Sunday, his body left on Wednesday. Now get a job and be happy with your life.

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why did the blond have a broken nose? because she was brutaly beaten by five rapists when she refused to have sex with them.

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Why was the boy late for class? He was late because he got stabbed and left in the bathroom.

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Roses are red, Viiolets are blue, Get in the gas chamber, You dirty Jew.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller Drive? Because she was a woman.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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your mom is so fat.

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If Johnny has 5 apples and Susie has 7 apples, will they give them to the homeless?

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Is this the Krusty Krab? No, this is an overused joke on a kid's cartoon. Thank me later.

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What does a jew to enter in a movie theater? He buys a ticket!

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Why couldn't the skeleton cross the road? Because it was dead, thus incapable of independent movement.

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An innocent man's home was raided by police, who accused him of grand theft auto. It turns out it was just a case of mistaken identity.

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There once was a boy walking down the street. He got shot in the head. He died.

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Knock knock I don't even have a door just walk in

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why did the kid with no legs get eaten by wolves? he couldn't get away

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How dis the chicken cross the road? On it's chicken wings.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9!

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roses are red violets are blue you little stupid a*s b**ch i aint f***ing with you

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two snow men standing in a field and one says to the other can you smell carrots

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What happens when your read this? you don't laugh

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sdjhkferiughefljbdfnjkbhdfghlwu24537? 928ndfnfwdjfhoinbv;nop[

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ed. Ed who? Ed Begley Jr.

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A mermaid found a magic lamp at the bottom of the ocean. She rubbed it and a cat with 9 lives came out so he didn't drown.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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