What do you say to a man with no legs at a bus stop.. How you getting on.

a man walks into a bar and buys a drink

Why was the prostitute's throat sore? Allergies.

why is my wife crying? because she doesn't like tomatoes

Firgen and the blung brigade

Why was the mime crying? Her husband died.

Have you seen Whitney Houston's new house? Neither has she.

I can't submit this joke because I got the captcha wrong

Why does 1+1=2? Dunno, e-mail me if you do.

Friends are like balloons.. If you stab them they die.

Dick Cheney That's the joke

A man runs into a bar, sits down in a hurry and demands a beer from the bartender. The bartender looks at him wearily, but shrugs, pours him a beer and sets it down in front of him. The fat naked man then drinks the beer and leaves.

What's the difference between a ghost and a dolphin? A ghost isn't a dolphin.

Whats worse than seeing your family killed in front of your eyes? Not much to be honest

What do dogs call gaseous exchange? Woof!!

Why couldn't the boy watch the DVD about pirates? Because his mother did not understand the importance of putting the disc back in it's case after use, and as a result, has become too damaged for the DVD Player to play.

What goes in dry and comes out wet Gum

Why didn't Jesus like Pizza? Because Pizza doesn't exist.

why aren't black people real? they are. just because they are less visible at night makes no difference.

What did the orphan kids get for Christmas? Cancer.

what did the super popular, beautiful girl say to her stalker? i dont know, i wasnt the stalker.

what is orange and blue 2 colors

What's faster than a black man carrying your TV? The law enforcement that promptly catches him and is about to charges him with theft regardless of his ethnicity because stealing someone else's property is just generally an unlawful thing to do.

Whats worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Having a Hippo give you head.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...