A man and his wife are disagreeing about what type of car to get. The wife continously nags him about getting her something that will go from 0-200 in 4 seconds, so he gets her a scale and buys himself a truck, 1 min later an abulance is called because the wife hit the husband with his new car.

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A woman gets home from bying tampons to use later in the month. She walks into the house and sees a heart box with a note from her husband of 5 years. The note reads: Roses are red - violets are blue - Fudge Is Sweet - Heres some Fudge...........She then puts the note down, eats the fudge, and has diarrhea a few hours later. The husband comes home and feels bad because he forgot that fudge upsets his wife's stomach. Later that night the wife asks her husband to have anal sex with her. The husband agrees but later regrets his action since his dick is now discolored and smells of shit..........Two days later the family dog dies. The wife and husband mourn. I like cheese

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Q: How many black people came KFC on June 31st? A: None because June 31st doesn't exist.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is an object and the black man is a human being.

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Knock, Knock Whos There, Jews, Jes who, Whould you like some jews with that.

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why did the blond get and abortion? because she was forcefully raped by her 42 year old boy friend and felt she could not raise a child on her own.

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why couldnt hellen keller drive? she was a woman.

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Ryan Maharaj is INDIAN!

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A man walks into himself. He is revealed.

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you know whats not funny white boards.

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I'm HIV positive.

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what happened to the asian who failed his math quiz... his parents killed him

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so a horse walks into a bar and the bartender syas why the long face and the horse says naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

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why did the chicken cross the road? He saw his family getting murdered and tried to stop it but got hit in the process

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why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

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Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: Why did you just verbalize the onomatopoeic sound of knocking on my door rather than taking the action itself?

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A man walks into a bar at 1 in the afternoon. He's the bartender and a fellow employee asked him to cover the afternoon shift.

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Why couldn't John ride a bicycle? Because he is a fish.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A present.

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Did you know that all of the seasons are named after coils of metal? Except Winter... And Autum... And Summer...

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What do you call a guy with an axe in his head? Chuck

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Whats the difference between a cow and a sheep a cow goes baa and a sheep goes moo

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Q: What's bad about 4 asians getting shot? A: There could've been five

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops