Why did the boy drop his ice cream? I shot him in the face.

what did the dog say to the muppet? WOOF

Twelve men walk into a bar, and get stuck in the door because it's far too small for all of them to walk through at the same time.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was being chased by a wolf, who promptly ate the chicken when they arrived at the other side.

I told my grandmother to act her age.... she then died

Why was the dog fallowing the fat guy. The fat guy said come.

Why did the man think he was hungry? Answer: Because his brain told that he needed to Eat or he was going to be really hungry. Made by eli

laughter is the best medicine, unless you have cancer, then you will die.

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. And that's when I found out my Uncle Ted was a cross-dresser.

What is yellow, has wheels, and lays on it's back? A school bus after a traffic accident

Roses are red Violets are blue I was diagnosed as criminally insane Wanna be my friend?

whats worse than a friend asking you if their ugly, telling them to look in the mirror.

whats the difference between ebola and a can of dead babies? i have ebola. this isnt funny at all.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where did my tractor go.

where was Billy during the bomb? Every where

why was the jewish boy afraid of ovens? because he developed an irrational fear of kitchen appliances. he would later, as an adult seek counseling and overcome his fear.

What do you call a cold chicken? A Raw Chicken.

2 beavers enter a bar, destroy all the stool legs, and leave.

How many People does it take to change a lightbulb? One

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

How did the two friends cross the busy road? They couldn't, because that would be considered jay-walking

why was the Jewish person accused of stealing money? because the police found his finger prints.

What's worse than getting a parking ticket? Getting brutally raped in the anus by the Dark Lord Satan.

How does a black woman know she is pregnant? When she pulls her tampon out the cotton is already picked.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...