That awkward moment when you have to tell your child you wanted an abortion, and still wish you had.

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Why was the Black man running with a T.V.? Because he had just purchased a new LCD FlatScreen from BestBuy, and a torrential downpour had just began and he didn't have a free hand to hold up his umbrella.

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Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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What do you call a broken boomarang? A stick.

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Lewis

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911 jokes are just plane wrong

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A woman walks into a bar She is raped.

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What's the most famous anti-joke? This one.

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What do you call a redneck virgin? A seven year old who can run faster than her brothers.

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Ey hornboy give es a SCAB

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Why didn't the jew eat pork? He was vegetarian.

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What do you call a women with 2 black eyes? Hopefully nothing because abuse is something that shouldn't be messed with and it is wrong.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" Turns out a man suffering from schizophrenia believes he is a bartender for animals as his health slowly declines as his family comes to visit him every day.

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Simon says.. Nothing because he's deaf.

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What do you call a clock that neither ticks nor tocks? A broken clock

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A murderer walks into a bar with a knife. He then stabs seven people and is then arrested shortly after.

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A little blind girl goes up to her mum and says, "Mummy, mummy, when will I be able to see?" Her mum replies "I'll tell you what, I'll take you to the chemist and get you some special cream for your eyes and you will be able to see in the morning." So off they went to the chemist, got the cream, and went home, all the while the little girl was getting more and more excited at the prospect of being able to see again. Once they got home, the mother put the cream on the little girls eyes, wrapped a bandage around her head, and took her to bed. The following morning the little girl stumbled into her mums bedroom and excitedly shouted "Quick mummy, take off the bandage so that i will be able to see again." So the mother slowly took of all the bandages, taking her time, and all the while the little girl was getting more and more excited. Once they were off the little girl said "But mummy, I still can't see." To which the mother replied, "April fool!"

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Why shouldn't you download music? Various reasons.

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That day where Captain America becomes too weak and frail to hold his own shield.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Skeletons neither have muscles nor brains to control any muscles and therefor cannot transport themselves across a road or any stretch of land for that matter.

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? one, hes an electrician

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Why did the young boy drop his bus. He was hit by an ice cream.

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What's black, white, and red all over? An interracial man with multiple stab wounds.

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- What would you say if you'll see a Mexican eating hamburger in fast-food restaurant? - Enjoy your meal.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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