What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

What happens when a chemist dies? They are given a proper funeral and buried.

josh sucks polish adams dick

What do Whitney Houston and Selena Gomez have in common? They are both dead. Exept for Selena Gomez..

whats worse than the Holocaust....6 million Jews

MR MR WHO?? MR MC CANN

What did the Mexican, the European, and the Canadian all have in common? They weren't used in this joke the last time someone posted it on anti-joke.com.

How many squirrels does it take to change a lightbulb? 42.

Q-what did the bus say to the other bus? A-nothing, buses are incapable of talking

Why was Martha put in a wheelchair? She was hit by a rabid cabbage.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house..... knock knock! whos there? THE CHICKEN!!

Why was the boy sad? I don't know, what do think I am? An umbrella? Why would you even think FOR A MOMENT that it's OK to just ASK me random stuff? Do you have ANY IDEA who I am?! I'm your worst nightmare, and if you ever ask me ANYTHING without permission again, or so help me I will drown the nearest pet goldfish. P.S. His cat died.

What's black and white and red all over? A butler with a stab wound.

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing 'cause you done told the b i t c h twice!

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hello

An Asian man walks into a bar and ask the Barman for a beer, the Barman is racist and therefore tells the Asian man to leave his pub. The man goes home and drowns his children in the bath and pushes his wife down the stairs, he is found out by the police and is given a life sentence in jail. 5 years later the Barman kills someone in a bar fight and is also sent to jail for life. The Barman meats the Asian man in prison and they settle there differences with a handshake. Two days later the Barman was stabbed in the neck.

What's blue paint and smells like red paint? Paints

why did the chicen cross the road? because it saw an excellent deal on hair products on the other side of the street.

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't.

The snake had no skatebord to put johnnys refrigirator because the bettles mom had stolen the clowns purse were his parking had been for the airplane higway stop.

A muslin walks into a bar, and has the same equal rights as everyone else and orders a pint of fosters.

What Would George Washington say if he were alive to day. why are all the slaves free?

Whats worse than 1 bee sting? 2 bee stings,whats worse than 2 bee stings? The holocaust Whats worse than the holocaust?.. 3 bee stings

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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