Q: How many Jews can fit in a car? A: 5 in a standard mid sized sedan, or 7 in an SUV

Whats sad about a black man killing himself? That shaft DVD that he rented will probably be late now.

COME HERE, POTTER!!!! NOW!!! Instead of agreeing to approach the source of the rather hostile summoning, Potter decided to sit down and eat a healthy vegetarian lunch of sausages and chips.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead...

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

A priest, a pastor, and a rabbi walk into a bar. All three are alcoholics and have done irreparable damage to their livers.

Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

How the hell do you know? What are you Nero? You are completely right! I was going to say I got no blue tie, but then I forgot you often call ribbons for ties... How? Should I be scared? I am not, no wonder you never felt human... I am shocked, I cant think straight I am confused and... Sorry Nero, Goodnight, if nothing else, you are no demon, but rather an angel, sweet dreams love. The solvemedia says the bible, this is freaky, my mind is numb.

Why was the black racist guy and the white racist guy, who 0hated each other, afraid of Michael Jackson? They didn't want to be the other each others color.

why did the kids pull the fire alarm? because there was a fire.

what did katness save her Life? because peter hates her and katness is peaches and peter dies in the titanic because it is gay shut up becky

What is big red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater.

Three irishmen walk into a bar...every day, and then stay until it closes.

A Fat person walks out of mcDonalds

Your mama's so skinny; she can fit into most swimsuits sizes 4-6 and has a rather petite bottom.

Roses are yellow Violets are carpet.. Get it...?

Your mom is so fat that her Body Mass Index is 30,?which is considered obese, she should really try to lose some weight.

melons are berries, tomatoes are fruit, being a smart-ass isn't that good.

You know what they say about guys with big feet. They have big feet.

Whats the difference between Amanda and Brittaney spears? Nothing, they are both worthless sluts

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? A miracle

Why did sara fall out of the tree? -she had no arms.. Knock knock. -who's there? not sara.

I need a way to meet local babes and get ripped in 4 weeks. Shame there aren't any popularly advertised methods of doing that around here...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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