How do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot.

yo mamma so fat that when she goes out in high heels she comes back in flip flops

Roses are red Violets are blue The sky is also blue

A blind man walks into a bar. Nobody is surprised.

Q:What happened to the fat man that rode a roller coaster? A:He had fun

What's worse than finding a hair in lasagna? An earthworm crawling into your ear and feeding on your intestines.

Q: What do you get when you cross Rebecca Black and a day of the week. A: a stupid song called FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Friends are like snowflakes, they go away when you pee on them.

How do you eat a candy cane? Shove it in your mouth and chew.

An asian woman was driving along the freeway one day when a police officer pulled her over and arrested her, The officer arrested her because she had killed her husband 5 years ago and she thought she had gotten away with it.

Why did the baker turn off the oven? He had run out of business

What did the penguin do in the desert? Die.

A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar. The three of them discuss theology for quite some time and then begin approach various patrons with invites to attend their respective Sunday services.

Why was the clown sad? Because he was found guilty of raping and murdering 33 young men, and sentenced to death for 12 of those murders by a jury of his piers.

5 little monkeys jumping on the bed 1 fell off and broke it's skull. Momma told the doctor and the doctor said,"Your a bad mom."

Three explorers are walking through the jungle when they are suddenly captured by a group of cannibals, the cannibals, going through years of culture and hereditary custom, kill the explorers, skin their bodies, chop them to pieces and cook their flesh, finally they eat it giving them a prosperous feast while the rest of the world is unaware of whatever happened in that jungle.

A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

Knock Knock. - Whose there? ... ... ... ... Damn kids.

What's the difference between a man and a woman? The latter has two additional letters added to the beginning.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was strapped to the first monkey.

* Are you afraid of dinosaurs? * No, they're all dead.

Q :Why did the girl fall off the swing? A: She had no arms.

What did the man dying of cancer want for his birthday? To live.

what do you do when you see a black man limping across your frontyard? you stop laughing an reload.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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