What do a goat and an eagle have in common? They both can fly, except for the goat.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, and died of cancer

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what do you call a cat that looks like a lion 7

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What did the salami say to the ham? Nothing; meat can not talk

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What happens if you drop a baby of a cliff It dies

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie roll pop? It would have to take a reasonable amount of licks for enough enzymes in the saliva to breakdown the hard candy part.

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whats worse than killing someone? finding out your mom is your dad

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What do u do when u hear about a smart Blonde. Cant think of anything? Exactly

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Nerochan, it was really nice chatting with you, I hope we can chat some other time... Please tell me why you are upset with me, just pick up the phone, I mean let me know what I did you wrong.

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A 21 year old man walks into a bar. After looking at the menu for a minute he orders the cocktail of the day. The bartender looks at the man in disbelief because he has such a baby face and looks like a teenage kid. The bartender politely asks to see his ID. The man pulls out his wallet and shows him his drivers license. Sure enough he was the legal age of drinking. The bartender says "Thank you" and gives him his beverage.

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How many bears does it take to screw in a light bulb? None; it’s a fairly menial task requiring little more than a single human hand. Requisitioning any number of bears for the effort would be an extremely dangerous “Rube Goldberg”-esque solution to simple problem.

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What did the wife get her husband after he became a paraplegic in a car accident? Divorce papers.

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Who has big muscles and is good at wrestling? A wrestler

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Knock knock, who's there? Your mom! Oh I'm comming.

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Why is the melon having a wedding? Because it cantaloupe.

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Weebles wobble, but paralyzed kids fall down.

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BBW BABY IS THE BEST BETTER THAN THE REST WELL EXCEPT MILF BABY. SUBSCRIBE TO BigHDGuns

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What happens when you get hit in the face? You get hurt.

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What do you call a guy with no arms or legs laying on your driveway? You call him by his name

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Why didn't the girl's ring fit? She had no fingers.

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Why did the black man have a Lamborghini in his garage? Because he got good grades in school, was accepted into a nice college, and earned a medical degree, which he used to get himself a well-paying job in the medical field.

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why did the depressed man jump off the bridge? He likes bungie jumping, and wanted to cheer himself up by doing one of his favorite hobbies

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make me a sandwich! what kind?

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What is you problem!? Im retarded, what is your problem?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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