A man walks into a bar He orders a beer, drinks the beer, then leaves.

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, what can I get you?" He is then checked into the psychiatric ward at the local hospital, for talking to a duck.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house No Neither has he.

Why did the blonde girl lie? Because she's a liar.

How do you keep an elephant from charging? Shoot it with a high powered gun right between the eyes.

why did your mum die young because she had canser

A dog walks into a forest and sees a whale. The dog asks "aren't you supposed to be in the ocean?" The whale replies, "yes."

What do you call a creepy person trying to break into your house? A robber

What's got 2 thumbs and a massive penis? A body parts collector I know called Harold Fortescue

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

Chuck Norris was once engaged by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

What is the difference between a bike and a baby? There are a lot of differences

Hail Heetluh

What did the bank clerk say to the robber when he demanded all the money in the drawer? "Okay."

How do you punish Helen Keller You don't, she's dead

why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it got hit by a bus.

Did u think that last joke was funny? Well this one isnt

Your parents shouldn't have met. I was thinking that as I contemplated suicide.

What was even more disgusting than the holocaust? Lucy's new shoes.

Guess what? What? Your dog is dead.

when life gives you lemons... squeeze the juice into your eyes.

rose's are red violets are blue bernard is mine and yours too if you hurt him in any way i'll punch you in your face and make you gay Krissc

What do you get when you mix Lil Wayne and Lil John? A full size John Wayne

A man walks into a bar, little did he know it was a gay bar and a few of the regulars were drinking and got overly aggressive the unaware man was then forced into the bathroom and raped by the aggressive gay lovers

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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