What did the monk give to the cancer patient? His love and reassurance.

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What's bloody and has wheels? The Holocaust I lied about the wheels.

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How do you make a tissue dance? You give it dance lessons.

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What's the first thing that goes through a persons mind when they get shot in the head. The bullet.

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What's worse than one bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? 3 bee stings.

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Why did the boy throw butter out the window? To test the principles of gravity.

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What's the difference between a Rabbi and a Priest? One's a Jew, one's a Christian

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your friend: i did ur mom you: jokes on u my moms gross friend:.....

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What's white on top and black on bottom? Society.

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whats chinese noodles

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How do you get five black men in a car? You offer them a good deal, then show them the car fax.

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Chris:"knock, knock" Rhianna:"owwww..." Chris:"open da door" Rhianna:"so u can punch me in the face" Chris:"duhhh, I jus got brass knuckles"

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Sugar is sweet. Plums are too. Prison rape isn't funny either.

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Q: How did the black man get to the first branch on the tree? A: He climbed, like the average person.

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A horse trots into a bar. He is left with a bump on his head.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He removes the piece of lingerie from his face and continues shopping for clothes.

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Uber Driver: "Hey I'm close, where are you?" Me: "oh, I see you!" Uber Driver: "Are you that guy in the middle of the road?" Me: "yeah, floor it"

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You can lead a horse to water, and you can pick your friends, but you can't sneeze with your eyes open.

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What did the blind man say when you asked hi his favorite color? Nothing he is death too

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Jimmy comes home from school one day and goes to his mother. "Mommy, guess what?" "What?" "I had sex with my teacher today!" Naturally after hearing such news the mother gets appalled and tells her husband. "Well, that's my boy" he says "Now that your a man Jimmy we're going to go out and get some drinks tonight be ready in a half an hour." So they arrive at the local bar "Wait here son, you can sit down and save us a table and I'll go get the drinks ok?" "No dad I think I'll stand" "..why? What's the matter son?" "My butt hurts"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the KFC man was chasing him.

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Why did the bear eat the asian? It was hungry

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roses are red violets are blue pornhub is down ya mums facebook will do

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DAAAAAAAAMN! I AM BEHIND THE SQUARE WHEEL AGAIN! AND THAT SHIT IS POINTY! PRETENDING TO CARE IS SUCH A HASSLE! Anyway, I hope you know I was joking (otherwise you would totally be,not as smart as I thought) but yeah lets see, I am the fourth most pointless MAN, after "The square wheel", "My wife" (:)) I guess some guy just married the wrong wife huh?) And the the fucking wheel is a billion times more manly than Justin Bible or whatever you called that... Thing, and that wheel is made from a female tree! What? HAVE THE LAST COMMENT? I DO NOT GET HAVE! I GET TAKE BY FORCE! Well as far as comments and go, and sex of course.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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