roses are red violets are blue i have no money could i have some

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The trick to making a good anti joke is having anticlimactic ending.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Schizophrenia.

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roses are red violets are blue does this smell like chloroform

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What did the white male say to the black male who had just robbed a bank? I'm glad you have a reliable source of income to feed yourself and your family

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roses are red violets are blue your mum is a whore as are you:)

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Whats funny about alexis? she's really a boy!

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What happened to the chicken that crossed the road? It got ran over by a car!

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? A teenage girl was texting and driving, didn't see it, and now it's roadkill.

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What do you tell your dad if he constantly gripes about his balls? He's got testicular cancer and he's going to die a horrible painful death.

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How many dead babies fit in a car? Ask Casey Anthony, she'll probably know.

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Why did the little hamster die? Because it had a careless owner who never paid any attention to it. therefor it passed away.

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I drink poodle juice for breakfast lunch and dinner I was then turned into a tree

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How do you know a black man's been in your backyard? If you throw a barbecue and your friends of African-American descent decide to bring cold cuts.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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How can you outsmart Stephen Hawking? Steal the wheels of his chair and replace them with a dolphin.

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Why was Hellen Keller a bad driver? She was a woman

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Knock-Knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Why are u crying?

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a brunet,a redhead,and a blone were stranded on an island 4 miles away from land. the brunet swam 1 mile and drowned. the redhead swam 2 and drowned. the blond swam 3 miles and decided to swim 3 miles back to the island

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Dude, that's not banana ice cream...

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A family has been forced out of their house by ghosts. Who are they gonna call?... Their insurance company.

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I met this girl and we really got along, then one night she tied me up, I thought she was getting kinky...then she ripped my face off....

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Why did the kid poo his pants? Because he was Matt Daly

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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