What's purple, red, green and does jumping jacks. Nothing... that sounds pretty crazy if you ask me.

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A black guy walked in to a gas station, walked up to the counter and payed for his items with his debit card.

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Why was the Black man running with a T.V.? Because he had just purchased a new LCD FlatScreen from BestBuy, and a torrential downpour had just began and he didn't have a free hand to hold up his umbrella.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in every apple.

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Q:What's worst than reading a bad joke? A: Reading a joke on anti-joke and the person who posted the joke obviously doesn't get how a anti-joke works. For example... read this again ^^

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how many dead guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homosexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual pandas just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homosexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Who. Who who? "My name ism't really who, it's Thomas. I thought it'd be funny if I made you say who who, as though imitating an owl. However, I understand that childish jokes like that are not funny and if anything stupid and immature. I am sorry for wasting your time. I will go continue my solitary life alone in a crappy tenement... Damn government. They have money to fight wars against foreign countries and yet no money goes to feeding the poor. Do you think life of easy for me loving like this?! I'm such a lost cause not even my own parents want to see me! And I'll be damned if they're still alive. A dad who beat me and got drunk even night, and a mom with breast cancer"(Thomas, overwhelmed, proceeds to have a mental breakdown). The man at the door comes out to comfort him. "It's alright man. i'll help you out." He let's Jeffrey stay with him for the next four months. They both get raped by a T-Rex.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A blind fish.

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How do you get a dog and a baby mixed up? You stir your chili.

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What's red and can't speak ? A strawberry

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Where was the declaration of independes? At the bottom

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Dakota Fanning

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What's worse than finding a holocaust in your apple? A worm.

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Why did the man buy his wife expensive flowers? It was their anniversary and he is a faithful husband.

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why is dog animal? it is not fish! 18 fits of has hair only have is Buddhist

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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How many seeds does a watermelon have? None. It is seedless.

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An Irishman walks out of a bar.

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how do you tell a politician that you hate him? politicians can be female, too.

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Q: Were did the balls go? A: In the sack.

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What do you get when you cross Michael Jackson? A collision, if Michael Jackson were alive.

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Daisies are green, poppies are white, I have a headache.

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How did little Sally break her Nintendo DS? Her abusive father repeatedly abused her and punished her until she was thrown into a stone wall. As she went into the wall she crushed by another wall and broke the DS.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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