The horse walks into the bar and the bartender says, "why the long face?" the horse looks at him and says, "my wife just died."

How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask him to lower the volume a bit and maybe also play a quieter tune.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks why the long face? The horse, unable to comprehend human speech, promptly craps on the floor and leaves.

Wanna hear a funny story? Sure. Ok,

Inbreeding is no laughing matter but damn is it funny.

What time did the Chinese man go the dentist? About 5 minutes prior to his appointment

whats the difference between slade , and wizard? wham

Whats brown and sticky? Shit.

Why did the platypus have no friends? Platipi are antisocial creatures by nature.

Why couldn't Timmy go to the bathroom? He was constipated.

A Black man walks into a bar. He then has a drink of Alcohol and walks home to return to his family.

What's sad about a black guy driving up a hill in a car? It's yor car

Why was the pig squealing? Because all four of its legs were tied together and it was about to have it's head chopped off so the meat could be processed for people to enjoy.

If you put two black men in an empty room, what will they do? They will most likely try to figure out why they have been put in such a confusing scenario. Then one of the black men will suggest the possibility that maybe they are being used as a subject of a joke. The other black man agrees then they both hang themselves since they have no other purpose in life.

So a white president,a mexican president, and a black president,are on a plane and its going down. The white president wishes he was a dove, and he flies away to safety. Then the mexican president wishes he was an eagle and he flies away to safety. Then the black president falls out the plane and says o s**t and turns into poop.

Roses are red. Violets are blue.

What's the difference between Jesus and a painting? It only takes one nail to hang up a painting.

Why do all gingers get mad all the time except having sex? Because they enjoy it!!!

A blonde girl walks into the local dry cleaners. She places a garment on the counter. "I'll be back tomorrow afternoon to pick up my dress." she says. "Come again?" says the clerk, cupping his ear. "I said 'I'LL BE BACK TOMORROW AFTERNOON TO PICK UP MY DRESS'," says the girl, this time louder.

Q: Why did the clown fall off the swing? A: Because he was shot in the face

A white man walks into a bar. He stabs 4 people and 1 escapes with extremem blood hemorages. his fanily later finds him bleeding on their family car. They take him to the hospital where he is put on life support. Later that night they are told there is nothing the doctors can do and the man slips away in his sleep. Who is to blame? The black guy in prison.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 went to a house party. 7 was there. 7 and 6 kind of new each other. They went to the same school, but weren`t really friends. All night 7 was giving 6 strange looks. 6 started feeling uneasy, so he left the party early. When 6 got in his car 7 was inside waiting for him and pulled out a gun. Luckily 6 got away from 7 safely, but has been scared of him ever since.

how how does a black man jump. the same way anyone else does

Nate has 32 candy bars. he eats 28 of them. What is he left with? 4 candy bars

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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