Three blind mice. See how they run. Into things.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Billy wanted a toy for Christmas. Sadly, Billy died before Christmas.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what's black, white, and red all over? A nun in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Several ways to annoy people: Grab the end of their shirt to blow your nose Try to shove a bowling ball down there throat Try to sell them a broom and vacuum Try to eat their babies paint their toe Nibble their ankles Ask if you can babysit their crystal and if they say no start whining Carry around your chicken and ask if they want a nugget

thumb_up thumb_down -9

An itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout Down came my dick, and forced the spider out

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Women's Rights

thumb_up thumb_down -9

teacher:humpty dumpty sat on a wall.... me: wait, why was he up there ms.park? teacher: well hes never been the same since vietnam, his wife divorced him and now hes a raging alcoholic.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Boys go to college to get more knowledge, girls go to Jupiter... Actually I lied, girls go to the kitchen

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Three men are facing a firing squad. They are all promptly executed. Even if they were to escape by distracting the executioners, they would no doubt be shot down before they could get for.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's faster than a Mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

My girlfriend says i cant finish a sentence properly dripping horse cum fetus rape.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What is big, long, hot, and firm? An erection due to the arousal of a woman's sex appeal.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

roses are red violets are dead honey is yellow and so is head

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Pretty vague, if I did not know you, Id conclude you where working for some mob syndicate or something.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

why didn't the girl show up for school? because she was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Alan: My Grandfather was in the SS and has a leather jacket made jews he killed. Me: Really? Alan: No, i'm korean. My grandfather wouldnt be allowed into the SS.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What does a man want more than sex? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the pony say when it lost its voice? Nothing. Ponies are incapable of speech.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This poem is getting old, I like cookies.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the pedophile say to the delightfully curly-headed youth? If I can't have you, I'm going to shoot you through the nails with a nail gun.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A guy walks into a bar. He goes to the hospital with a severe head injury and dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the speech impaired man say ? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops