Wizard: If you could get any one thing in the world, what would it be son? Son: Another father that grants more wishes.

Know what's funny? Not these jokes!

Whats the easiest way to get a dumb blond to have sex with you? rape.

You wanna hear a touching story? Once a pon a time you died. The end. (all anti jokes posted by me will be adressed with -blarg)

How do you get a black man down from a tree? Cut the rope!

Girl goes to see a sex therapist. Girl says, "Doc, though this has never been a problem, for the past 3 months I have been unable to reach climax. Can you help me?" Doc says, "Yes.". And after an intense 18 months of therapy the doctor helped the girl to discover that her inability to reach climax was related to issues of childhood sexual abuse. And after another 36 months of therapy the girl finally found the courage to confront and forgive her unrepentant abuser, as she realized that by not forgiving him, it was like drinking poison while hoping that he would die. And though the doctor did help her,as he had said, the girl never regained her ability to reach climax again.

What's worse than being raped? Not a whole lot-- rape is a very serious mental and emotional strain that will stick with a person for the remainder of their life.

Why was the boy at the funeral? Because he was dead.

What do you call an Arabic man flying a plane? A Pilot.

What does a cow do at McDonald's? He is eaten by obese people.

What have the TV programmes Shameless, The Jeremy Kyle Show and Benidorm all have in common? They are all examples of modern British society

You can teach a man to fish but you cant teach a fish to man

*Knock knock* I thought no one was home so I left... Turns out my grandma hung herself

What's so funny about losing the game? Nothing.

What happen? Idk...

Why did Sally fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

What do you say to Jews at a synagogue? Hitler is coming

Don't worry about giving me your phone number, I'll just follow you home later.

how do you stop a gang of black people from raping a white woman? throw a basketball

What's the difference between an orange? A duck.

What was wrong with the man watching a black and white television program? He wasn't watching a black and white television program at all-he actually had color blindness.

You know whats better than cold pizza? Winning a nobel prize.

Whats red, black and brown? My anus after a Friday night

i have a six pack.... of crayons......... just kidding i ate two of them

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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