Father Murphy met Samuel Myer on the street. Sam it's been a month o' Sundays since I've seen you. You look propserous. How's the moile business? A snip better, Father, since we talked last. And thank you. For what, Sam? Well the last time we met you asked what I did with the foreskins. Well, here is the answer, my new business. What's this, a wallet. But so smooth, Sam. Yeah, Father, but when you rub it. Rub it, Sam? Yeah when you rub it it falls apart. And you have to buy a new one! Mazel Tov!

Did you hear about the Dislexic Devil worshipers? They sold their soul to Santa.

What's short, green, and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

The latter three thousand pages of this website.

What did Anne Frank say to the German Officer? Nothing. She had to keep quiet in a cramp attic in order to survive.

A white guy jumps over the fence belonging to a Mexican family

Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

Once there was a ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end

Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he's usually in a good mood.

Why is Ellen Degeneres gay? Because she likes the same sex

Knock Knock Whos there? Opportunity

what do 9 out of 10 people enjoy?............Gangrape

Roses are red, violets are blue, whoever met you is a BIG fool

Why did the man go to the doctors? He was concerned about his health.

The president, Oprah and Abraham Lincoln are sitting in a crashing airplane. lol

What happened when Suzy fell off the swing? She hurt herself.

A woman walks out of the kitchen.

A group of young men walks into a bar. They drink some booze, laugh, have a great time and then go home to sleep.

Hey, have you heard the one about the elf and the watermelon? Neither have I.

How many blondes does it take to skrew in a lightbulb? Usually just one.

yo mama so stupid i'm fairly certain she has a learning disability.

What is the difference between a Camel And a Strawberry? A strawberry is red.

What did the blind quadriplegic get for Christmas? Cancer.

What starts with p and ends in orn? Popcorn

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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