how did superman die? he got cought in a plane engine!

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill all his friends and family.

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scenario: two teddy bears wrestling under water question: how many apples does it take to tussel with a potato answer: 96 becouse pillows dont eat chease

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What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into your grandmother and finding a fish

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Knock, Knock! Go away!

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Why did the weird alien jump everywhere? You probably don't want to know. If you learned why it jumped everywhere,you probably would make fun of it. I don't know if you know this, but aliens are sensitive. If you made fun of him, you probably would create World War 3:Humans VS Aliens.

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There is a blonde a Burnett and a red head. Life goes on.

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Legal Mexicans in Texas

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares what a Chicken does?

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whats better than a girl getting hit by a car? a girl getting hit by a car with my dick in her

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How many Obamas does it take to screw an economy? What do you think?

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You go to the Anti Joke website, what do you find under the "newest" section? Black jokes.

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There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

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Why did Sally have a headache? She had a Brian tumor the size of an eggplant.

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how do you save a black person that's drowning? you blow up their lips

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What starts with P and ends with "oop" POOP

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There were two friends, a girl and a boy. The girl had a ribbon tied to her neck, and every day the boy asked her why, yet she'd never tell him. They grew up together, and fell in love and still, she wouldn't tell him why she had the ribbon on her neck. They got married, and grew old, and still she wouldn't tell him. But one day, she said to him 'I'll show you why I keep this on my neck' and she took it off and her head fell off.

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Why didn't you hit the little mexican boy riding a bike? - it's probably was not your bike and it would have been against the law if you did so it was the kind thing to do -AHW

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What did the Irish nun say on her deathbed? "I now realize that smoking was an unhealthy habit and I regret that I made the choice to do so." Then she died

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How did the stuntman die? He was gored by a buffalo on a trip to Yellowstone.

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Roses are roses Violets are violets Sugar is sugar And you're a person

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Your mother is so dumb, that she had a very poor ACT composite score.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a car

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Why did the boy get hit by a wrecking ball? Because he picked up an upside down penny.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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