Find x X + 2 = 5 ^ I found it

Knock Knock. Who's there? Chris. Chris who? Wow, I thought we were better friends than that.

What is red and hangs around the back of a train? A miscarriage.

What do you call a puppy with all it's legs missing? Franklin, the quadraplegic puppy.

What did the blonde say when she found a dead bird on the sidewalk? "Aww, look at the poor dead bird!"

jingle bells jingle bells,, bells were jingled!

A Irish leaves and bump in to a really tall the Irish sorry boss

My friend just phoned me from the Boston marathon. He was being taken to the hospital due to being injured by the explosions and had to have his leg amputated.

why did your mom leave your dad because he was a drunk :l

Yo mama so fat that you should maintain strong eye contact with her and not look at her body.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

What did the the girl say to the deaf boy after he asked her out? He doesn't know

Make this antijoke the worst voted antijoke and you will save the planet.

Roses are red, violets are blue, Gee, I wish I could partake in even the first two lines of this stanza, but alas, I have colourblindness.

What did the little boy with cancer ask for from the Make a Wish foundation. A cure and to lose his virginity before he dies.

What do you call a calculator without a brain? A calculator.

"Really, how is your wife?" "You know she's dead right?" "Cool mine too!" They high five in mid air and lived happily ever after

How many Mexicans eating a Taco in California does it take to fix a lightbulb? 1

How do you confuse Hellen Keller? Put her in a circular room and tell her to find the corner.

Kid: My dad's brother has gone at it with a lot of women. Friend(sarcastically): Geez that's great! When was he born? Kid: '69

My neighbor's kid was running around yelling magical spells. I said "Wow, you really want to be like Harry Potter, don't you?". He said "Yes!". So, I killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

My friends new nickname is hawk-eye! He is a jackass...

Knock Knock Who's there? Jeff Oh hey Jeff, come on in

Nero here, nice to see you guys again, now you know why my babbling has been excessive (and pissed at the comments below, but now that the pills are working I am calm) Anyway, yeah point Zero is my "world" now, and its been thriving under my values (something I feared would just work on paper, and if so such beliefs would all been for nothing) As for hero... Well insert something like "I am no hero, I just do what is right" or something cheesy, or... Well, thats what I do really... Since nobody uses this site Ill extend the time you "former followers" can chat, as I got some nice stuff to share, and might just share a bit before I pass away (nah, but I will sleep when tired), I got a lot to do tomorrow.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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