Q. How many pancakes can fit in a dog house? A. 0. Penguins don't like icecream.

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What do you call a fly with no wings? Joseph

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what do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Bob

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A teenage boy walks into a bar, he doesn't even know he's slowly drinking his life away

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What couldn't the stereotypical pirate get into the movie? Well, considering that the stereotypical pirate existed in the sixteenth to eightteenth centuries and the first motion picture wasn't made until the mid to late nineteenth century, also the technology for time travel does not exist nor has it ever, I would have to derive that he was not let in due to the fact that there was no way for him to ever exist at the same time that a movie would have been playing.

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The Holocaust

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What did the young girl get for Christmas? Violently raped and murdered by her abusive father.

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What did the penguins get for Christmas? A hang-glider What did the polar bears get for Christmas? Death, The Holocaust, Global Warming, and all of Steven King's books.

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Roses are red violets are blue ... Aww I just don't give a damn and nether do you.

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Why did the tree fall? I cut it.

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roses are red violets are blue you look like a monkey lets take you to the zoo if by chance you try to escape ill take my fist and smash your little monkey face! btw i made this up if you use it ill kick your nuts!!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, most likely, the chicken escaped from a near by ranch or farm. Upon escaping, he may have simply wandered in the direction of the road, and hence crossed it. Or, with chickens having great curiosity, may have been attracted to something on the other side of the road and felt the urge to explore. Depending on the demographics of the area in which road was in, the chicken had different chances of being hit by an automobile. That's why.

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Knock knock Who's there? That that that. What makes you say that?

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Whats the fastest way to a man's heart?? Saw through his breastplate.

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What do you a a toilet with fecal matter in it? A toilet.

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A priest and a bunch of boys are in a room. They are having choir practice.

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What's the best way to eat 20 pancakes in ten minutes? With a fork

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Playing chess with a pigeon is like having an argument with a christian. No matter how good you are at chess, the pigeon will just knock over the pieces, crap on the board and strut around like it's victorious.

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Your mommas so fat that she has developed adult onset diabetes.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My room is a mess, Violets are still blue

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what is long,hard and holds semen,a submarine , i spelled seamen wrong

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Q: What's the Difference between Judaism and Catholicism? A: There are many substantial and vital distinctions between Judaism and Christianity. Of course, there are many similarities as well, primarily because Christianity emerged from Judaism. However, the emergence was not a direct line. Christianity broke from Judaism, forming a new religion, so it is misleading, however comfortable the thought might be, to believe that the two religions are essentially the same, or to see Christianity as the natural continuation of Judaism.

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Wumbo

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what did the little boy see when he walked into his parents bed room a bed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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