Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

69

Why couldn't the teenager go to the pirate movie? He didn't have any money.

Roses are red, my binoculars are blue. When your window's open, i'm watching you.

When does the Narwhal bacon? The Narwhal bacons at mid-night.

A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

There is a bomb. It blows up and kills 26 people.

What's funnier than a dead baby? A joke.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farm he was from was near a road. There was a hole in the fence and the chicken got out. He then started wandering and happened to cross the road.

Do I ever ask yo a question that I havn't given you the answer to Mr Hearty.

What's the worst thing that can go wrong while trying to archieve something you desperately want? -Everything.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

Why did the man fall off his bike? He ran into a pile of dead babies.

How did the Jew survive the holocaust? He didn't, he died.

I have a meeting with a man about a horse. I have a chance to win the triple crown. Barboro is gonna do awesome. Oh wait he is dead.

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He orders a drink successfully, pays, and leaves. Three weeks later he dies tragically.

What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? Boyscouts came back from camp

Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinsons..

Why did Timmy drop his ball? Because he was hit by a bus. A) Knock knock? B) Who's there? C) Not Timmy

i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

Flowers are colors Love me

like if u think princess kenny is the fairest maiden in all the land. if u dont, disregard this message.

How do you make an apple puff? Put the apple in a large pan with some water. Cover and cook gently for 20-25 minutes until soft. Add sugar and nutmeg to taste. Transfer to a bowl and leave to cool. Cover with pastry and bake until well-risen and golden.

What happened when the blonde girl threw a grenade? The enemy pulled the pin and threw it back

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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