What did the bank teller say to Santa Claus? May I help you?

why did the chicken cross the road? to touch the goats beard

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a blind-deaf-mute.

Q: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if he tore his ACL last week trying out for wood chucking nationals? A: Woodchucks don't possess the ability to chuck wood, nor do they have ACLs.

What do you call a lump on your penis? STD

what do you call a Ukrainian who eats pirogi's A walking stereotype

How do you know it's a bad day? When your brain does not release a high enough level of seratonin.

Me: f*** off Asshole: YOU'RE MOM! Me: -is dead.

Why did the chicken cross the road. ... It didn't.

Windows are likes prostitutes. You can have two in the front and two in the back!

Who was sorry when the fat kid fell over last year? The whole of Japan.

Why didn't Tom have to pay for his ride to the funeral? Because he was dead and in a coffin.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? HE WAS DEAD STUPID IDIOT.

why did javonne choose club getaway madonna wanted to foster

How did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it died. how did the second monkey fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the other monkey.

A Jew ran into a wall with a boner. He broke his nose first.

q. what did batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile a. hey robin get in the bat mobile

2 Men Walk Into A Bar, I Forget The Rest.

Why did Sarah fall of the swing... She had no arms. Knock knock, who's there... Not Sarah. Face Face, who's there... Probably Sarah.

What do you call a guy who died in a stampede? Grandpa.

Q. What is worse than a worm in your apple? A. Hitler

This joke is the worst joke ever.

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Because the light was green.

Roses are red, violets are blue, they really should be purple.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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