You read this in school as the kid sitting next to you stares at his computer screen.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Beat her with a spatula while in a mankini with a dildo up your ass!

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Why does Suzie like to wear sunglasses? Because she's blind.

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Wanna hear a joke? no

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What did the penguin do in the desert? He died .

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Knock Knock Whose there? Its John

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How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

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Whats brown and sticky? A stick

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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knock knock whos there? your mom really? well whats she wearing a refridgerator.

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What does a penguins wear on it's feet? Nothing penguins are incapable of wearing foot wear, also they do not have feet they are called 'flippers'.

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Whats really down a black hole? I don't know...The last person to go down one never came back because he died of AIDS.

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why was the blonde confused? because she was born with a low IQ making her mentally retarded.

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How do you make your mom mad? Burn down the house and eat the dog.

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If you put two black men in an empty room, what will they do? They will most likely try to figure out why they have been put in such a confusing scenario. Then one of the black men will suggest the possibility that maybe they are being used as a subject of a joke. The other black man agrees then they both hang themselves since they have no other purpose in life.

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What happens when a jewish man, black man, asian and an amish man get on the same plane heading to Chicago? The reach their destinations safely and go their separate ways.

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Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

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A white guy, a black guy, and an asian guy jump off a bridge. Who hits the ground first? It doesn't matter. They are all going to die.

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A man walked into a bar. He was meeting his friends but was 30 minutes early so he went down the road to buy some food. He had recently began dieting after watching a series of lifestyle programs which informed him of the potential risks involved with high cholesterol and blood pressure levels. He purchased a garden salad and a freshly squeezed orange juice, and made it back to the bar in time to meet his friends.

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One man calls emergency: - Come immediately, my little son has swallowed a condom! After five minutes, the same man calls back: - It is OK, I found another one.

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I was jaywalking when it hit me. You know, a car.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Why did Suzie get raped? because she was out past her bedtime. and the morale to this story is that its funny to be raped.

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How do you change you dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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