what does lady gaga have that some people dont have? a penis.

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whats funnier than a banana an orange -may bieber

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When does the ice cream get thrown at the yellow horse on thursday evening? Purple Monkey Rainbow

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What looks like half of an apple? The other half.

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You have 37 candy bars and you give your friend 12. What is the square route of the sun? Yes

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was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

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How do you choke a lawyer? You squeeze his neck until he stops breathing.

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Why did the plane crash? Because a tomato was the pilot.

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Why was the fat girl a virgin? Good morals

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How do you ask a blonde out to dinner? Politely

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How I seem math word problems Scenario: 2 astronauts kayaking in the Sahara desert Question: How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse Answer: Purple, because ice cream has no bones

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you just read an anti-joke

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What did the clown say when his car broke down? Sh*t!

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What do humans and trees have in common? -If you hit them with an ax multiple times, they fal down

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Superman wears chuck Norris pajamas Just kidding superman is a fictional character and is uncapable Of owning pajamas

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How did 6-year old dyslexic boy start his essay on soap? Sopa is shit...

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A man shouts a women crossing the road "Oi, get your rat out love!" So she did, and it savaged his face.

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Remember that comic blooper? Captain America fighting some dude: Okay buster only one of us is getting out of here alive! Next panel: Captain is kicking his foe and yelling AND IT WONT BE MEEEEEEEE! ...

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Why cant t-rexes clap their hands? They no longer exist

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What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

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How do you confuse Hellen Keller? Put her in a circular room and tell her to find the corner.

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Why did the man pee his pants? Because he was paralyzed from the waist down and had no way of feeling

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Once there was a pig named Poga. When he grew up, he was slaughtered and made into bacon.

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What do Kobe Bryant and a toaster have in common? They both rape white women. Except for the toaster.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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