What did the dog say to the other dog? Ruff, hi, ruff ruff, we are both dogs ruff ruff, ruff ruff, ruff!!

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how do you wake up lady gaga? set her alarm for a reasonable hour

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 20 years later he would gamble away his life savings and then go onto live a lonely and unfulfilled life.

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Q: A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? A:They both take turns, because they are driving across the country and it would be hard for one of them to drive the entire way.

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How many gun shots does it take to kill you? 1..2... 3...4... Samantha reapeatedly kept shooting her enemy until she noticed that her enemy was Chuck Norris. So how many gunshots does it take to kill Chuck Norris? The world may never know.

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have you seen hellen kellers new treehouse? no well neither has she

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What is the name of the car? What

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Why did the woman stop jogging? She got mauled by a bear.

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Your mum is so fat, she is likely to do die before my mum.

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What did the T-REX say to the Yettie? This is a highly improbable situation, therefore there is no need for an answer.

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What do you call a black man with mishap-in head scares on the left side of his face and a 3rd degree burns on the right side? a very unfortunate guy.

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How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? none, you can't see them in the dark. Vincent

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Why can't Larry drive? Because he doesn't have his license, and his temps expired!

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dylan wishes life was like cod. that way he would actually be able to do something cool

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Knock, knock! Who's there?! Your Mom! Your Mom who? No really. Let me in.

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What goes 100 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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What did the elderly lady say to the man? You still have not repaid my services

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What do you get when you combine a potato and an apple? A nice Apple Potato Souffle...

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What did the alien say to the parachute? We're connected

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Knock knock! Who's there? Me.

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knock knock. no one answered so the man at the door went home.

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How do you save a black man from drowning? I don't know GOOD!

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70% of heroin addicts die at some point in their life.

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What sound did the man make? Splatt. He fell off a building.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops