How is a fat girl like a tiny motorcycle? She isn't, and you should be ashamed of yourself for even thinking how she might be.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did Lucy have blond hair? Answer: Because both her parents had recessive hair traits.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Roses are red, Violets are blue, That's okay, I'm not colourblind.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

womens rights

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas. A: A bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

(Played Basketball for 15 years) I TOLD YOU I'D QUIT WHEN LeBron Gets A RING

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Where do you find a dog? At a pet store.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

what do you call a black woman pregnant with twins? A woman who has a loving husband who she wanted to have children with so when they had sex, 2 of his sperm fertilized the egg so now she gets to raise two children which she is looking forward to, but she also knows it will be alot of work.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A man finds a magic lamp and rubs it. A genie appears and says that he will grant him 3 wishes. The man says "I wish for a duck". POOF! He got a duck. Then he says "I wish for a penguin". POOF! A penguin magically appears. He thought long and hard for his 3rd wish. Then he said "I wish I had a turtle" POOF! Suddenly out of nowhere the genie disappears. The man looked inside the magic lamp and saw a small turtle. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How many pencils does it take to get an A on a test? Actually it takes knowledge.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheelchair

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Two black guys and two asians get pulled over. The cop says i cant let you go unless all of your dicks add up to 15 inches. They added up to exactly 15 inches - The black guys both added up to 7 inches each and the asians added up to 1/2 inch each. When they were driving away both of the asians said thank god we had boners.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he (assuming he bears male reproductive organs) saw some corn on the other side (using the light rays refracted primarily by his cornea onto the retina) which is his staple diet as he is a herbivorous chicken. As corn is the producer of the food chain in question and the chicken is the primary consumer, a fox being the secondary and an angry farmer being the tertiary, he needs to ingest this food source in order to obtain the glucose required to produce adenosine triphosphate by the process of aerobic respiration in the mitochondria of his chicken cells. Thus, the chicken crossed the road.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

"....did he fire six shots or only five....." It doesn't really matter, considering he will die of blood loss soon

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats cold and can't climb trees? Refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -3

My did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I love you, you love me. Barney is fat and not entertaining.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

what is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews are people and regularly attend a synagogue and pizza is and italian food that many people find to be enjoyable to eat

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Hello Braydon I am at home where are you?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What would happen if RAINN Wilson, the actor, married Michael MANN, the director? They'd probably be arrested; 2 men can't get married in California anymore (thanks a lot, Utah)!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats funnier than throwing a baby off the top of a building? The sound it makes when it hits the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Where did Lucy go went the bomb went off? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down -3

have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he....

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops