What do you call an underground train full of professors? It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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Whats the hardest thing to have sex with? a goldfish.

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What if there were no hypothetical questions?

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Why did the homeless man kill his dog? Because a drunk rich guy said he'd pay him a hundred dollars if he did.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

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Whats worse than forgetting some thing at the supermarket? your nuts being nail gunned to the wall.

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Did you hear the one about the girl who had three nipples? Neither did I.

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what do you call a ginger......... billy and mickee.......

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was really frogger in disguise

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Your mother is so old, she could easily be considered a senior citizen.

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What is the difference between a cow and a clam one is bivalve and one is a mammal

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How did the blond know that you like her? You said,"Baby, I like you"

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Wanna here a funny joke... Trevor michael dyess's social life.

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roses are red, violets are fine, you be the six, and I'll be the nine.

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Q: What's funnier than Women's Rights? A: Nothing.

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How do you tell if your lesbian lover has cheated on you? If she's pregnant.

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what looks like a banana? a penis

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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What did the priest say to the Atheist when he walked into the church? How are you?

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Roses are red violets are blue. Yes.

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HAVE A GOOD DAY. DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO.

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Don't turn around when you're talking to me. Why? You will walk off of that cliff

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Why did the tornado cross the road? Cuz it's a tornado. Don't question it. Run.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops