Why did the chicken cross the road? Because grass don't eat meat.

Why can't sluts count to 70? Well, slut is a derogative term for prostitutes, and most prostitutes are people that had rough, often traumatising childhoods. Many ran away from home at an early age, thus leaving them devoid of a proper education.

How many women does it take to changed a light bulb? 12. 11 to form a committee and 1 to make her boyfriend do it.

What do you call a panda without a head? Dead.

In my country we don't swim, we drown.

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A chicken and a horse go into a bar due to an imperative of an earlier joke, they notice that there are flowers on the bar. The flowers are red and blue. They wonder what they could be.

Was that last joke funny? Well this one isn't.

A man walks into a bar. He walks out 10 minutes later because he was satisfied with the new hooker he killed and made out with in the bar's bathroom.

Roses are red Violets are blue I like pussy Because it feels really good when I stick my penis inside her vaginal opening

The funniest thing about this joke is that by the time you realise it doesn't say anything its to late to stop reading it

How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

Refrigerator

What do you call Mary in a wheelchair ... virgin mobile

A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

If there's something strange in your neighborhood. Who ya gonna call? The Police.

What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you? Run, 'cause she's got a grenade in her mouth!

What word is always spelled wrongly? None of them. Every word has been spelled right at some point.

Why did sally fall of the swing? She had no arms or legs Knock knock who's there? Not sally

What's orange and rhymes with a parrot. A carrot

What has four wheels and flies? A flying car.

What did the white guy say to the black guy? What's up?

What did the black man do for his science project Which is better homemade or colonel sanders?

Whats brown and sticky? Shit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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