What did Edward Cullen say to the hot girl? Since I am a vampire it is impossible for me to get an erection.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

follow @nils_kosmo on twatter hehe

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What's better than being rich? Not living in Kenya.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

I told my doctor I’m the first man on the face of the earth to suffer from morning sickness. He promptly corrected my mistake; my excessive vomiting is actually caused by chemo.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Girl goes to see a sex therapist. Girl says, "Doc, though this has never been a problem, for the past 3 months I have been unable to reach climax. Can you help me?" Doc says, "Yes.". And after an intense 18 months of therapy the doctor helped the girl to discover that her inability to reach climax was related to issues of childhood sexual abuse. And after another 36 months of therapy the girl finally found the courage to confront and forgive her unrepentant abuser, as she realized that by not forgiving him, it was like drinking poison while hoping that he would die. And though the doctor did help her,as he had said, the girl never regained her ability to reach climax again.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What happens when a chemist dies? They are given a proper funeral and buried.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What's the one good thing about being a paraplegic? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

jsahgfvdjfhgdehv? oiyduhgfdushy

thumb_up thumb_down -40

A Jew, Christian and a Muslim walk into a bar. They have fun there a good time and then they go home.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Why did the man put his money in the freezer? Perhaps he didn't believe in banks.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Rap. Skate. Smoke.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

My dog has no nose, how does it smell? Using its anus.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

A American, a Brit and a Mexican decided to bet on who could tell the funniest joke. The one that won told a great joke indeed.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

What's the difference between you and a bucket of shit? The bucket and the shit. You're a human being.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

A Christian asks god why there is so much pain and grief in the world. God does not exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because Your mother said so. Now get a life and get off this website young fellas.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

What did the preist say to the other preist? 'hey! we're both preists!'

thumb_up thumb_down -42

What did Billy say when he met the president? Nice to meat you Mr. President? -Louis

thumb_up thumb_down -42

What does a dishwasher and the holocaust have in common? Not much.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Non-Anti-Joke.com!

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Nope, I mean you can try, but my phone is busted and the code on the chip my galpal here managed to finally get into the cell, has sixteen digits so damn small that none of us can read it,

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Knock, Knock Who's there? The Johnson Family was then heard on the morning news for letting a murderer into their home before being brutally killed.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Q: What's funny about a gay man being raped by men for being gay? A: The man's personality

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Boston was having so much fun everyone was running and screaming

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops