What has two legs and can't walk. Someone thats paralyzed!

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What do you call 4 Mexicans at the bottom of the ocean? Cuatro sinco.

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What did the lighthouse say to the tree? Nothing because they are both unatimate objects and cannot speak

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What do you call a white guy in a joke? The first joke to specify one of the people in the joke as one with Caucasian origin.

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I'm hungry.

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Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face! -Lets go Mets

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Sugar is sweet, And so is she.

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My mom

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What is 9 inches long, the same colour as my skin, and makes my girlfriend gag when I shove it down her throat? Her Miscarriage.

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Where's Stevin Hawkins? He went for a walk.

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What do you call a Russian man who is on the moon? A cosmonaut

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Why did the chicken cross the road Why? Because his house was burning down on the other side

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why did the kitten not eat its food? because its face was stapled to the floor.

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I used to be an adventurer like you, until old age slowly took away my ability to move and go adventuring

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What should someone do if they are Le Zirk? Have a zirk. THEN FIRE THE ZIRKKK!!!!!!!

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Q: How do you cure cancer? A: By die aids first

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I wont vouch for anybody right now, but nobody I know would attack anyone, I know I can be overly sensitive at times, but its not fun anymore, stop that.

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Marla should be home by now, it's nearly 6." He was unaware he had lost his tractor until the next morning.

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A man sits down to dinner with his wife And she notifies him that their 8 year old son just died

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Do you play piano? No

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How do you make someone stop talking? Shove a rock down their throat.

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Q: What happened to the dog when he eat the banana? A: he got raped by a monkey...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops