What did the doctor say to the actor? Your an actor.

One time there was a guy who jumped off a bridge and died

Why shouldn't you drink and drive? You might spill your beer

Stop procrastinating.

What happenswhen a geman shepard jumps into a lake? it gets wet

Whats black, white, and read/red all over? What? Michael Jackson after his surgery.

what do you call a black lawyer? a very well educated black man

What's the difference between a dead baby and my girlfriend? My girlfriend is alive and 19 years older.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

Why was the boy named Bethel? He had horrible parents that wanted him to live a life of social poverty.

what is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 11 dead babies in a trash can

Knock knock! who's there? Doctor Doctor who? No, this is your actual doctor, you have cancer.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Listen, it's a free country.

what gets louder as it gets smaller? a baby in a trash compacter.

How did the weak old man with cancer beat it? He hung himself.

Why did Suzie get raped? because she was out past her bedtime. and the morale to this story is that its funny to be raped.

If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed. I will also remove you from my friends list on Facebook because stealing isn't nice.

a red boat and a blue boat collided all the survivors still have nightmares to this day

What's worse than a pile of dead babies A live one eating its way out!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LPFTeHEsAS4 You will not be disappointed.

Whats white and blue and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a fridge in a denim jacket :D

What did the Asian say to the Mexican working at the friutstand? Hi, I'm Asian!

you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

Why did the Mexican get arrested? Because he crossed the border.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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