As a teen girl was walking through the perfume shop, she picked up one called, "Swirly Paradise." She sprayed it on her and sniffed the sweet scent. Suddenly, the world spun around and she suddenly woke up inside an empty bra. A mouse sniffed her and ate her alive.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Want to hear a joke? Me to...

thumb_up thumb_down -38

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The brunette and the redhead escape, but the blonde is captured. Why? Because she had a prosthetic leg sustained from a previous injury, and thus couldn't run very fast.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

What's the difference between an orange? Mooses don't like to wear sweater-vests.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Skittles are tasteless. Why? You can't taste the rainbow.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Your momma's so fat...

thumb_up thumb_down -92

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? A warm meal thanks to a Charity organization.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

What's green and has 4 wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did the monkey fall out the tree? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What's worse than getting Alzheimer's? ........what am I doing here.....

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Know what's funny? Jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Your mother." "Your mother who?" "Really?"

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the man say to the man? Awkward.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's the difference between a red cube and a green cube? Nothing, I'm color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How many hispanics does it take to screw in a light bulb. One. Just one. You just screw it in, it's not that complicated.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A crazy priest squats down and poops in the middle of the church... nobody understood what was going so they pointed and laughed.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

So a priest and an atheist sit next to eachother train After talking to eachother for a short period of time, the priest discovers the other man's beliefs and procededs to spend the rest of the ride trying to convert the atheist. Incredibly irritated the atheist gets off the train a stop early to escape the tirade. The next day the atheist sees on tv that the train crashed right after getting off, and the priest is listed amongst the people killed in the accident. He is ecstatic, and says to himself "ha, proof of divine retribution," but then he feels confused because he realizes he doesn't believe in a god...

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

a horse walks in to a bar and the bar tender asks, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because it is a horse and is confused by its surroundings and then gallops out of the bar knocking over a few tables as it makes its escape.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: what did the hot dog say to the hamburger A: i want your buns

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Two muffins are in an oven. They are then baked at 375 for about 30 minutes and then taken out to cool.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Jesus wept.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Thomas Hobbes had a good life Actually he was born prematurely which caused his mother to die, and his alcohallic father left him at a young age to an abusive older brother sucks to suck Hobbes, at least you were smart

thumb_up thumb_down -11

wats worse than gettin bitched at by ur mom? gettin raped by a giant scorpian n getting SUPER ULTRA MEGA AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops